Sunday, April 20, 2014

Review from a Factionless

So, a couple nights ago I cancelled (read more along lines of opportunity cost versus benefits here before judging me!) a class to go see Divergent with the zombies. Now, I was having really low expectations for the movie because the book was a major disappointment. However, I wanted to see some good action and basically see Shailene be anyone but Amy Jurgens and I was well, surprised, weirded out and perplexed.

Here's a picture of River Song reminding you what I write down is full of 


First, here are some names this movie could have been called
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- That movie where Shailene's hair stole the show. I mean, seriously. Jolene compares nothing to Shailene and her auburn locks that are just so magnificent. No wonder she could never be in Abnegation. Her hair was meant to be in Dauntless.
- Tris Prior and that time she looked up people's tattoos. Not just once, but like three different times and if this move was any longer we might see her looking up more people's tattoos. In fact, I think one reason she chose Dauntless was so that she can look up more people's tats!
- Tris Prior is a Special Divergent Snowflake. Partially, it's not her fault. It's the faction system and the writer's need to make Tris become that ferocious and fearless heroine. If you can change factions, doesn't that make everyone Divergent by default? No? maybe I don't know anything because I'm not a freaking special Divergent snowflake.
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- The Bucket List 2: Dystopian Chicago Version. Move over Morgan Freeman, Tris is jumping off moving trains, jumping into holes, climbing Ferris wheels, eating hamburgers, getting tattoos, killing people, zip lining, making out with instructors, crowd surfing and more. 
That movie where a Kate Winslet lookalike played the villain. This is my fault. I thought she looked so much like Kate and I was telling Abe that and he was like "yeah" and later only did I know it was indeed Kate. :|
Amy Jurgens & that time no one thinks she can do anything. This movie had so many Amy moments, it made me laugh so much. Especially the scenes where Tris is holding a gun and people keep telling her she can't shoot. Amy in Secret life is the same. She's such a goody goody no one thinks she is capable of doing anything. 

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- Hazel and Gus's Dystopian Chicago Adventure! Bonus: Featuring cameo appearances by Rose and Sutter. Plot: Gus and Hazel find themselves playing a reality show pretending to be brother and sister forced to wear 50 Shades of Grey and they decide they like Blue and Black better so they part ways Hazel falls in love with her instructor. 

Things I wished to see more of:
- Back stories: Like Al's story and why the betrayal made Al suicidal.
- More of shirtless Four. I mean, there was only one scene. They could have at least showed us Four scenes of shirtless Four. I'm sure no one would mind. 
- Less make-up shots. It's a dystopian Chicago for crying out loud. People are factionless and dying and still Tris has time to have perfect smokey eyes? 
- More action. Like when Tris beat Molly up. 
- That scene where Eric embarrasses Tris when she comes back from Erudite. I swear Eric was there was for the first half of the movie, and he makes NO appearances until the last 10 mins. WHERE DID HE GO? 

Things that don't make any sense (or all the times I rolled my eyes while reading/watching)
- Factions. Are people in Tris's world completely one dimensional characters that are ONLY one thing? Like you need to be brave to be selfless and so on. Also, WHY did they make factions? There was a mention  of a war but who were they fighting against? Also what about everyone living outside Chicago? What happened to them?
- Faction before blood. What a stupid motto. So, sixteen year olds are supposed to leave their parents just because they want to be cool and jump off moving trains? 
- IS BRAVERY BEING STUPID AND WEARING BLACK AND JUMPING OFF MOVING TRAINS. OMG SUCH BRAVE MUCH JUMP MOVING TRAIN WAU. 
- Also what's with jumping from moving trains? What if you're disabled? Is there no place for disabled people in Tris' world? or are everyone perfect? And and do all these people jump off the train like four times everyday and how in the world can they have so much energy and how are they alive so far? Dauntless should be called the land of stupid decisions and tattoos. 
- Where are the rest of the factions? Also who the faction decided that Abnegation should be political leaders? Why can't they have political leaders from all factions? What is even the point of that stupid war?
- Erudite thinks Abnegation spends money on factionless but Erudite has enough money to research on and make highly complicated serums by spending billions of dollars but they are unable to buy a car or have enough food? I'm sorry this whole thing just went over my head! At least in hunger games we have Capitol and Snow to blame for because they are plain evil. Here no one's evil and if they just went and talked with Abnegation, this book didn't even needed to happen. I'm pretty sure Abnegation people would listen and give away their spots easily, afte rall they are super selfless. 
- Factionlessness. Why are factionlesss people the scum of the society? Why is that they can't go back to their own faction? And if Dauntless is choosing only 20 people to initiate then they are just leaving the rest to be factionless and to die? What are the factions even there for if you are gonna let a bunch of 16 year olds rot and die because of your stupid and unjust system? WHERE IS FREAKING ERUDITE WHEN YOU NEED THEM? 

Things I liked about Divergent 
- Caleb not choosing Abnegation. It was one of the two things that I didn't foresee and I liked it very much. 
- Caleb and Tri's parents pain. To have both their children leave them and to have them become the enemy must be heartbreaking. The writer could have shown this pain so well but it goes undermined. 
- The logos for factions. They are pretty cool and I loved them.
- Christina. She was a kick-ass character and we should have seen more of her. 
- Four's back story. I really really liked the fear landscape and Four's story. It was amazing. 

I have heard that the other two books and better so I'll probably read and watch the upcoming three movies as well. Even for just the lulz. Are you a true Divergent fan? or are you like me and just could not like it?

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